"“Yesterday, DeSantis flew two planes of Hispanic immigrants to Martha’s Vineyard. Hey, Ron, if you’re trying to discourage immigration, maybe don’t send people to one of the loveliest parts of New England just in time for leaf-peeping season.”"
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- Stephen Colbert
"“Good luck to Mike Lindell. I’m not sure you want to go to jail being known as the MyPillow guy.” "
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- Jimmy Fallon
"“When I was a little girl, all I wanted to see was me in the media. Someone fat like me, Black like me, beautiful like me. If I could go back and tell little Lizzo something, I’d be like, ‘you gonna see that person, but b**ch, it’s gonna have to be you.'” "
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- Lizzo, accepting her Emmy Award
"“This guy doesn’t look like he has $15. Look at him! Millions of dollars? He looks like he sublets from Oscar the Grouch.”"
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- Trevor Noah, on Steve Bannon
"“Imagine being a guest at Mar-a-Lago and using the bathroom, and out of the corner of your eye you just notice something and are you like, ‘Hang on. Is that — is that Norway’s nuclear codes?’”"
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- James Corden
"“The special master has to review over 11,000 documents, which could delay the investigation. Only Trump could avoid jail just because there’s too much evidence.”"
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- Jimmy Fallon
" “If anyone’s hiring, we all need jobs.”"
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- "Full Frontal with Samantha Bee" producer Allana Harkin after the canceled show's Emmy win
"“My kid is a huge Tolkien fan and after Amazon got involved he came up to me, looked me in the eye and said ‘Dad, please don’t f*ck this up’.”"
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- Jeff Bezos, on Prime Video's "Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power"
""I'm going to stay vague because you never know.""
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- Serena Williams, on whether the US Open will be her last tournament
""I wish that Whitney Houston and Michael Jackson were here. I wish people understood what they were going through. I wish people took mental health seriously, even for those who seem to have perfect lives.""
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- Nicki Minaj, in her VMAs thank you speech
