"“Shut up! You’ll get us all killed ― and I just started ‘The Handmaid’s Tale.’”"
- Stephen Colbert, after President Trump threatened North Korea with "fire and fury"
Quotes
""Trump tweeted he will be working in New Jersey while the White House goes through a long-planned renovation. The White House does need some work — apparently that place has a ton of leaks.”"
- James Corden
"“It’s very heavy. You put it on and everyone is like, ‘You’ve such good posture, you’re so regal,’ but no, my head is being pulled backwards.” "
- Actress Serinda Swan at TCA, on wearing a Medusa wig in Marvel's Inhumans
"“Donald, you’re the president of the United States — it’s like being a parent: You have to love all the states equally. Even if one of them is Eric.”"
- Stephen Colbert, on President Trump calling New Hampshire a "drug infested den"
" "Yes, immigrants have to learn proper English — like 'bigly,' 'covfefe,' and 'bing bing bing bing bing.'""
- Stephen Colbert, on the immigration bill that favors applicants who can speak English
" "Because this is Hollywood, there will be big changes to the Olympics. For example, the entire Chinese Olympic team will be played by white actors.”"
- Trevor Noah, on LA winning the 2028 Games
""The Mooch lasted as Communications Director for only ten days! Ten! That's not even a whole pay period. His going away party can serve what's left of his welcome cake.""
- Stephen Colbert, on the exit of Anthony Scaramucci
""The project is currently in its infancy so we hope that people will reserve judgment until there is something to see.”"
- HBO's response to Sunday's #NoConfederate hashtag protest during Game of Thrones
"“Taco Bell announced it would begin selling a ‘potatorito’ — which is beef, cheese, potatoes and chipotle spice wrapped in a tortilla — for $1. Or, for the same nutritional value, just eat the dollar.”"
- Seth Meyers
"“Another big story is Trump’s feud with Attorney General Jeff Sessions. When asked what will happen with Sessions, Trump said, ‘Time will tell.’ When asked if he was just stealing lines from his Magic 8-Ball, Trump said, ‘Ask again later.’”"
- Jimmy Fallon
CynCity
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