Quotes

""You are just trying to get in a rhythm with Alex’s voice to find that exact second to buzz in. It’s like a zen thing – it’s like hitting a curve ball.”"
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- Jeopardy! champ Ken Jennings, on when to hit to buzzer
""Every January 1st I think, 'THIS is the year I break the curse that witch put on my hair.'""
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- Conan O'Brien
""Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account.""
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- Oscar Wilde
""'Tis the season to start sentences with apostrophes.""
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- Conan O'Brien
"“This is the last episode of 2019. But if you’re black, this is the first episode since I left back in 1984.”"
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- Saturday Night Live host Eddie Murphy
""FUN FACT: Tonight's #DemDebate will last 3 hours, but will somehow also last 15 hours.""
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- Daily Show tweet
"“Of course, it’s a dark stain on his legacy; but on the bright side, Trump finally managed to win a popular vote.” "
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- Jimmy Fallon, on the House's vote to impeach the president
"“I don’t even know how to describe the tone of it. I guess if you took the most privileged white lady ever and gave her a whole bottle of wine and then asked her to write a Yelp review of a restaurant that made her wait 40 minutes for a table and then got her order wrong twice.” "
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- Seth Meyers, on President Trump's angry letter to Nancy Pelosi
"“In 2019, a conservative group complained because of an ad that showed two women kissing? What are you getting mad for? They’re kissing at their wedding; it’s the last time they’ll ever kiss, relax.”"
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- Trevor Noah
"“That’s how you know that these are strange times. In one room, Trump is going after a 16-year-old on Twitter; in the other room, Melania is talking about the perils of cyberbullying.”"
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- Jimmy Fallon
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