Quotes

""Please let 007 drink his martinis in peace. Don’t shake him, don’t stir him.""
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- Screenwriter John Logan in the New York Times, on Amazon's acquisition of MGM, including the James Bond franchise
"“When did governing become the safety school for when the guest spots on 'Chicago Fire' dry up?”"
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- Bill Maher, on celebrities running for political office
"“If Obama were under investigation, we would be talking about that, too, but he’s not. The only news Obama makes these days is showbiz related. In fact, if you hear about Obama investigations, it’s probably a new show on HBO Max.” "
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- Seth Meyers
"“According to the White House, Biden and Putin will discuss a full range of pressing issues from Ukraine to government hacking to whether or not they’ve guessed the killer on ‘Mare of Easttown.’”"
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- James Corden
"“Covid cases in the U.S. have dropped to the lowest level in almost a year. Pretty soon the only place you’ll see Dr. Fauci is popping out of a costume on ‘The Masked Singer.’”"
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- Jimmy Fallon
"“Here’s how messed up the world was when I hosted: I wanted Kanye West to be the musical guest. And he couldn’t do it because he was running for president. Also, the week I was here, the sitting president who said Covid would disappear got Covid. That was this season.”"
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- Chris Rock, on SNL
"“You know, when a violent mob attacked our embassy in Benghazi, Republicans in Congress investigated it eight times. A violent mob attacks the U.S. Capitol, they’re like: ‘Tourists! What are you gonna do?’”"
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- Jimmy Kimmel
"“Former New York mayor Rudy Giuliani’s son Andrew Giuliani announced his run for New York governor today and told reporters, quote, ‘It’s in my DNA.’ Also sharing Rudy’s DNA: his first wife.”"
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- Seth Meyers
"“I didn’t even know they had Venmo on rotary phones.” "
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- Trevor Noah, after is was revealed that President Biden uses Venmo
""The Republican Party is changing. I don’t know what happened! I don’t know what I did wrong. Look at me. I am everything a conservative woman is supposed to be: blond, mean.”"
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- SNL's Kate McKinnon as Liz Cheney
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