""President Biden had a video call with Russian President Vladimir Putin and warned him if Russia were to invade Ukraine, Putin would feel, quote ‘economic pain.’ I like that Biden is talking like a professional wrestler from the ’80s.”"
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- James Corden
""Here’s some good news. Dr. Fauci said that the first data on the severity of the Omicron variant is ‘encouraging.’ Yeah, that’s what passes for good news in 2021.” "
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- Jimmy Fallon
"“This is not how I want my time at CNN to end but I have already told you why and how I helped my brother. So let me now say as disappointing as this is, I could not be more proud of the team at Cuomo Prime Time and the work we did as CNN’s #1 show in the most competitive time slot.”"
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- Fired CNN anchor Chris Cuomo
""We don’t know if it might spread more easily or we don’t know if it will be more deadly. It’s just too early to know. And I hate to sound like someone describing every streaming show right now, but you gotta stick with it the first couple of weeks and see where it goes.” "
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- Trevor Noah, on Omnicron
""It does matter and it does make a difference how you help your brother and what you’re helping him with. Like, if your brother murdered somebody, you can either help him get the best lawyer in the country, or you can help him bury the body. I mean, both make you a good brother, but one makes you an accessory after the fact.”"
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- Trevor Noah, on CNN's Chris Cuomo
"“It’s kind of like when the trailer for the movie ‘Cats’ came out — the only thing we knew was ‘Well, it’s not going to be good.’ But we didn’t know the extent of how not good it would be.”"
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- Jimmy Kimmel, on Omicron
"“Omicron — it sounds like a Transformer who can’t smell or taste.”"
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- Jimmy Fallon
"“President Biden traveled to Nantucket today for Thanksgiving, but only after Jill made him swear on the Bible: No limericks.”"
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- Seth Meyers
""On Friday, history was made because Joe Biden temporarily transferred power to Vice President Kamala Harris while undergoing a routine colonoscopy, making Harris the first woman to assume presidential power. Yes, 100 years after women got the right to vote, we finally got the first female president on a technicality.”"
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- Stephen Colbert
"“If you have the budget to make 14 movies and you only have 11 great ones, let’s just make 11....you want to make sure that you’re delivering at a pace that people see greatness consistently instead of randomly.”"
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- Netflix head of original films Scott Stuber, to the NY Times
