Quotes

"“Ikea said they’ll do whatever it can to throw a useless tiny wrench into Russia’s economy.” "
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- Jimmy Fallon
"“According to a new poll, 71 percent of Americans who watched President Biden’s State of the Union address had a positive reaction to the speech. But let’s be honest: Everyone who would have had a negative reaction was watching ‘Yellowstone.’” "
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- Seth Meyers
"“It was a tough speech. Biden said that even though the country is divided right now — right now, we all need to come together and agree that the ‘Sex and the City’ reboot wasn’t anywhere near what we hoped it would be.” "
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- Jimmy Kimmel
"“Yes, the threat of nuclear annihilation may have increased; yes, we may be on the brink of World War III; and, yes, Europe is once again at the mercy of one power-hungry dictator, but on the bright side, when was the last time you thought about Covid?” "
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- Trevor Noah
"“Any achievement that I’ve succeeded in is the result of my mantra which basically is — be on time and don’t be an ass.” "
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- Dame Helen Mirren, accepting a Lifetime Achievement Award at the SAG Awards
"“Our goal is to compete with the leading streaming services, not to win the spending war.”"
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- Discovery, Inc. CEO David Zaslav
"“The [Oscar] categories that will not get the usual live on-air treatment are documentary short, makeup, hairstyling, original score, production design, animated short, live action short, sound, and editing — although it does feel ironic for the editors to be cut out of the show.”"
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- Jimmy Kimmel
"“From now on, Russia doesn’t get the new Wordle until noon.” "
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- Seth Meyers, on sanctions against Russia for the invasion of Ukraine
""Like lots of people, I couldn’t even log in because when it launched, select users who tried to create accounts were repeatedly met with a red error warning, ‘Something went wrong. Please try again.’ Though by the time you find yourself signing up for Donald Trump’s social media site, something already went wrong.”"
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- Seth Meyers, on the bumpy launch of Truth Social
""You can ban all the books you want. You can try to legislate it away. But, as any Black woman on 'The Bachelor' can tell you, talking about race is unavoidable. Not just unavoidable, it’s essential.”"
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- John Oliver, on efforts to ban the teaching of critical race theory
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